"You Can't or You Won't?"
The following phrase has added a ton of focus, prevented hundreds of regressions, and added value to my life:
“It’s not a priority.”
Essentially, I’ve worked hard to stop saying “I can’t” when what I really mean is “I won’t”. For example, if I’m really tired, I’ve had a long day, and I don’t feel like going to exercise I recite something to the tune of,
“I’m not going to the gym today because my health isn’t a priority. Sitting on the couch and watching Netflix is my priority.”
I hate the way that sounds. I won’t let that be true. So I put on my shoes, no matter how much I don’t feel like it, and I align my ambitions with my actions.
Not long ago, we were finishing up Adjustments Day and Hallye had mentioned to me that Harper really wanted us to go to her gymnastics showcase. My initial thought was a quick and firm, “We can’t. I gotta work.” Without pausing to gain perspective and reflect, there was so much that felt like it just had to get done.
Hallye brought it up again. This time it connected. So I said to myself,
“I’m not going to be there to watch Harper and cheer her on because it isn’t a priority. Getting this work done, right here and right now is my priority.”
It sounded wrong. It felt wrong. I asked my team for their help, they stepped up to carry more than their fair share. (Thanks Cass and Josh!) We worked as long as we could, moved some things around, and I turned off my computer.
We got to Harper’s showcase on time to see the whole thing.
Trying to apply discipline to the things that are most important, particularly outside of familiar settings and routine is a challenge. I think learning how to do this consistently is essential to the success of most people.
Lack of discipline and loyalty to what’s most important, regardless of the circumstances, is all too often what single handedly keeps people from building a bridge from average to exceptional.
This applies to all of the choices in life that bring us to a fork in the road but following the Macroholics program while traveling or while on vacation is one of many examples where this could apply.
Based on the primary definitions available, a challenge is, “a call to take part in…” something. To expand on that, something that’s challenging is defined as “testing one's abilities”.
Saying, “I can’t do this program on vacation.” Just isn’t true. Instead say, “Sticking to this program on vacation is challenging.”
At the very least, you can always hold to your calorie target no matter what situation you’re in. Is someone holding you down and forcing food in your mouth? Is someone telling you that you can’t bring high protein snacks with you? Are they forbidding you to find a store when you get there to get what you need to guarantee an A+ day?
You’re an adult if you’re on this program. Take responsibility and remove “I can’t” from life’s equation!
As a member of this program, you even have access to an Offline Nutrition Facts calculator that you can set up and use for situations when you don’t have cell phone service! Check that out under #11 of our resources page: https://www.macroholicsnutrition.com/resources/
Eliminate, “I can’t and “I couldn’t” from your vocabulary as much as possible.
Introduce, “It isn’t a priority”.
Keep in mind that using this approach won’t always result in you choosing to adhere to the Macroholics program. Here’s one that could go either way:
“I’m not going to follow the program today because my health and fitness goals aren’t a priority. Drinking and eating as much as I want on my anniversary with my significant other is more important to me than making progress towards my health and fitness goals.”
For one, you could have planned ahead and made this your reset day for the month. In that case, you can have your cake and eat it too! (Literally and figuratively)
If you don’t know what reset days are, check out #11A and #11B in our FAQ: https://www.macroholicsnutrition.com/faq/
That said, there’s no right or wrong answer in this situation. You just have to decide for yourself. But if you don’t like the way it feels to say, “It’s not a priority.” then you can do something about it!
Try it out when the going gets tough! When you don’t feel like doing something, identify the alternative and put it into the priority template below:
“I’m not going to ______ (CHOICE A) because _____ (THE “WHY” OF CHOICE A) isn’t a priority. Instead, I am going to _____ (CHOICE B) because _____ (THE “WHY” OF CHOICE B) is my priority.”
Here are some samples:
“I’m not going to the gym to exercise because my goal of getting off of my blood pressure medication isn’t a priority. Instead, I am going to go home and watch Game Of Thrones because relaxing after my hard day is my priority.”
“I’m not going to Go on this cruise because taking a vacation isn’t a priority. Instead, I am going to pay off my credit card because getting out of debt is my priority.”
“I’m not going to drink a protein shake because my fat loss goal isn’t a priority. Instead, I am going to Whataburger to get a green chile double, a large onion ring, and a milkshake because soothing myself with food is my priority.”
Regardless of whether or not you use the template, you still have to make the choice that’s right for you. But the reality is that most poor choices aren’t honestly and objectively evaluated when they are made. They are justified.
Practicing the skill of saying, “It’s not a priority.” When we feel ourselves slipping down the slide of self-justification gives us a chance to stop our self destructive cycles. We are given the advantage of an objective and honest reflection of our choices.
This empowers us to choose what’s most beneficial for our well being, contentment, and success more consistently!
1 Corinthians 10:23 NLT
“We are allowed to do anything, but not everything is good for us to do. We are allowed to do anything, but not all things help us grow strong as Christians”